Advice Part 5- Coffee "dates"

An invitation to coffee....it seems innocent, right? Err, no....

My advice for all the single young players out there is that BEFORE you agree to meet up with someone for coffee, make sure that their definition of "meeting for coffee" is the same as your definition.....

When I invite someone to meet up for coffee, what this means is:

• I like the person's company
• I would like to engage in further conversation with them
• I think it would be a nice idea to share such a conversation over a hot beverage.

However, I have come to discover that some people interpret "meeting up for coffee" as meaning:

• I fancy the person
• I want to go on a date with them
• I am too shy to simply invite them back to my place, so asking them out for a coffee is my idea of a "come on"

Case in point. Last year, I was attending a seminar at work, and I began chatting to a 50-something man in the break. He seemed nice, and so I vaguely suggested we meet up for coffee sometime.

BIG mistake.

He obviously believed that I fancied the pants off him, and sent me an email asking me to the opera, and inquiring if we could "take our relationship to the next level."

Our RELATIONSHIP?!

The NEXT level?!

And the OPERA?!

I don't know which of these three things horrified me the most, to be honest.

There followed a very awkward email in which I informed him that I was NOT interested in a relationship with him, and that I had just wanted a coffee.

In future, I shall be drinking my caffeinated beverages ALONE.