Advice Part 50- Why you should go to the movies at midday

So, with the end of part time work (and all the pleasures that that entails) almost upon me, I have come to reflect upon what I will REALLY miss.

And, I hate to admit it, but top of my list is that I won't be able to go to the movies at 11a.m. or thereabouts.........

Sad, I know.

My advice to young players is that if you have the opportunity to go to the cinema during the week, in the middle of the day, avail yourself of this chance, as it is IMMENSELY more enjoyable than fighting the masses on the weekend.

How do I know this? Read on.....

Today, as I didn't have too much to do (besides a stats report and a whole lot of qualitative analysis- but we won't mention that at the present.....) I decided to go to the movies. I checked the paper, and there was a session showing at 1:15pm. Bonus!

What's so good about watching movies in the middle of the day? Where do I start?!

Because most people are at work, the cinema is likely to be pretty empty. 10 people is a BIG session. This means that you can sit where you want, and have lots of space to yourself.

Due to the fact that the midday movie demographic tends to be older, there usually aren't too many chronic texters in the audience (although that's not to say there's never any!)

• If you are clever in choosing your days, you can usually get cheap tickets.
• You don't have to line up for ages to buy your ticket/go to the bathroom/sample the delights of the "candy bar"
• If, like me, you often go to the movies BY YOURSELF (shock, horror!), you won't feel like a social pariah, as almost everyone else there is similarly solo. Unlike on Saturday night, where turning up by yourself is, err, rather rare.
• Maybe it's just me, but I tend to fall asleep REALLY easily when I go to the movies at night. But if I go at, say, 12 noon, I'm feeling full of verve and vigour!

OK, so I sound about a hundred years old writing this. And I'm not going to refuse an evening trip to the cinema. But I'm also not going to say no if someone wants to head off to see a film at 10a.m......

Advice Part 49- Rom Com clichés....

I would like to think of my taste in films as being sophisticated and worldly. But every so often, I engage in a bit of cinematic mind candy in the form of romantic comedies, or "rom coms."

Any credibility I may have had has just been obliterated, I know.

But in the process of my rom com watching, I have started to notice that many of these films have an eerie sense of similarity about them, and almost invariably contain a "Hotel Room Mishap".

My advice to young players is, if you are ever in the position of writing a rom com, whatever you do, DON'T include a Hotel Room Mishap scene!

So, you may be asking, what exactly does a Hotel Room Mishap involve? Ask no more!

• The rom com couple, let's call them Mr A (typically played by Ryan Reynolds, Jake Gyllenhaal, or similar) and Ms B (think Sandra Bullock, Jennifer Aniston, Meg Ryan), meet.
• Although they clearly fancy the pants off each other, there is some impediment to their getting together (such as- Mr A is dating Ms B's best friend; Ms B is Mr A's boss; Mr A is training for the priesthood).
• There is a significant amount of Unresolved Sexual Tension (UST).

• For some reason (work conference, friend's wedding), Mr A and Ms B are required to go to another city for a period.
• And stay the night.
• But when they rock up to the hotel, there has been a mistake (!). Instead of booking two separate rooms, they have been booked to stay in THE SAME ROOM (!!). And, surprise surprise, there are no extra single rooms available (!!!). And there's only ONE BED in the room (!!!!)

• Mr A gallantly offers to sleep on the floor or couch, but circumstances transpire (e.g. the bathroom floods and wets the floor; Mr A has too much to drink) so that he and Ms B have to share the bed.
• Sexual tension is resolved.

OK, so this set up can be "amusing", especially if a Shower Mishap Scene (where Ms B stumbles on Mr A in the shower, or vice versa) is included, too.

But SURELY there is some other way of getting the couple into a bed together than ENDLESSLY repeating this same old scene?

Or am I expecting too much?